Here I am again in front of the PC, trying real hard to catch up with the world.  It’s been a few days since my last hardcore use of this PC due to typhoons, gimiks, papers and whatnots.  Now that school is practically gone, I should really be working for Days but what the hey, the breeze is cold outside and the house is quiet and empty almost quiet and empty, perfect for a muni-muni moment all by myself.

I look around the house and it’s in such a mess.  I don’t think I’ll ever let my friends in here, because it’s… messy.  (for the lack of a better term)  Only my best friend has ever laid eyes in this place, and it’s only for a few minutes.  But then, someone insists, so I guess someone has to clean the house (Uh, I believe that’d be me).  But then again, he says he wants to see my home, not my house.  Oh, I just remembered a story in the bible about Jesus going to Zachareus’ house.  A savior dining with the sinner.  That’d be the scenario when he stops by.

I’ve got to admit, it’s better this way. 
Way better than what we tried a few months back. 
No pretensions.
No pressures.
No expectations. 
Plain, simple me and you. 
No eyes to look at the both of us. 
No mouths to utter words of criticisms. 
I like it better this way. 
No more feelings of uneasiness. 
Enough of awkward moments. 
Let’s stop the madness.

I still love you, by the way.  (And you really shouldn’t have found out this way)

Classes just finished yesterday but the bummer factor is that my Polsci prof didn’t show up so we’d have to hold a make-up class on Tuesday.  Well, it’s a double-edged sword because her not showing up meant that we won’t be late in submitting our position paper (I woke up 8am yesterday and our class was 830.  My group’s position paper was with me and if we didn’t submit it on that period, it would have been late).

Haaayyy… I could only heave a sigh…

October 6, 2006 has got to be one of the best (if not the best) days of my life! (Next to attending Days with the Lord, Being the Vice-Rector and Passing U.P.)  So many blessings came my way yesterday that I found myself saying, Tama naaa!!!  Whooo!!!  Sobra na tooo!!!

I wouldn’t delve into details but I’ve got to say, Overjoyed isn’t enough to describe the way I felt yesterday and especially last night.  Salamat sa aking kuya! Üü

Katuwa yung Psych exam kahapon.  May grey area ako dun sa exam kasi I was absent for a day, ‘di ko naman alam na lalabas sa exam yun.  Buti na lang multiple choice, at least puwede manghula.  Common sense na lang.  Kaya ayun, bumawi na lang sa essay, as always, paikot-ikot at pinuno ng highfaluting words na ewan ko ba kung maiintindihan ng prof ko yung pinagsususulat ko…

It doesn’t matter when;
I’ve known and felt it,
And that’s what matters. Üü

Haaayyy sobrang saya.  Ang sarap-sarap ng feeling!  I’m glad to have taken this rollercoaster ride with my Kuya.  At least I was with him in all my ups and downs, in all his ups and downs.  That’s what’s important, and I’m forever going to treasure this time in our lives.

What scares me is the fact na baka bumawi ang tadhana.  Baka may masamang balitang dadating.  Okay, okay, so Karma isn’t a Catholic belief but based on experience, ang sobrang saya ay may katumbas na sobrang lungkot.  Well, sana totoo nga yung sabi ni kuya na baligtad; pagkatapos ng sobrang lungkot na linggo, sobrang saya naman.  Ewan ko ba, masyado kong inu-underestimate si God.  I know He’s still faithful.  ^__^

Haaayyy… one day more to go, and we’ll find out what will happen with our lives.  One more day to go, I dread of knowing what’s bound to happen, but it’s as if I could do anything more about it… One more day to go, one more day to go… One more day to go…

Wherever you go, I may not be able to follow; so bring my heart with you, okay?

I just found out that this song was a tribute song when HBK bid farewell to WWF.  Now, when did that happen and why didn’t I know about it?  In any case, it’s a really great song…

Let me blog about what I’m feeling right now.  Right now, as in right this minute, I feel like my heart is going to come out of my chest.  It’s thumping so hard, real hard, and I don’t know why.  Okay, so maybe I know what’s causing it but I don’t know why it’s thumping real hard.  Is this what Ron feels whenever he has palpitations?  Anyway, it doesn’t feel so good.  No, nu-uh.

Recent turn of events had left me asking many questions.  About life, about the things that are happening, you know, purpose-driven-life stuff.  This phase is so hard.  Okay, so maybe I’m getting a lot vague, it’s just that I can’t put to words what I’m feeling or thinking right now.

What I know is, I want classes to end.  More than being able to rest from academics, I want to free my schedule to squeeze in more important things.  I want to free my schedule na!!!  Please, stop academics.  Stop stop stop.  Ayoko na talaga mag-aral.

Is it worth it?
Is it worth what we’re doing?

Even though I know we’ll part ways soon
I still plunge out into the deep
I still make memories with you
I still make memories we could cry upon later
And when we cry, later we laugh because we cry
And then again we make new memories
Each one sweeter than the other
Each one harder to let go than the former
Each one brings more pain when the time comes…
Of your departure

If only days like these could go on…
But I know it won’t
It never will
And that’s what hurts
Because I know I’d be hurt spending more time with you
But I can’t seem to stop myself
From making use of the little time that we have together
If only I could always be by your side
And never leave for home
I’d do it.  Yes, I will.
I’ll never leave you…
Even if I know you’ll leave me…

I don’t know how I could thank you enough
My whole life isn’t enough
But remember this, and never forget
That what I am now, it’s all because of YOU
If not for you, I wouldn’t be in this place
If not for you, I wouldn’t be anywhere
If not for you, I wouldn’t… I couldn’t…
If not for you.

Üü